The Eternal Internal Battle

.•¤ Professional Crisis ¤•.

First of all I need to say that this is a personal post, solely and exclusively based on how I feel ok, and if someone feel like me or are going through the same situation I can only say ... "Welcome Aboard Little grasshopper".

I tend to say that my head is like the eye of a hurricane, nothing ever keep in place and everything is always in constant transformation, I've always been a very restless person, I think this is due to inheritance of the hyperactive child that one day I was, my tastes change very quickly, in fact everything changes very quickly for me.

I'm the kind of person who says, "Ok I've found my favorite movie," and two weeks after watching another movie says, "Ok I've found my new favorite movie," I don't see that as a bad thing, quite the contrary think it is a characteristic of mine who helps me a lot, for example, I can get interested in many different things and learn so much more than if I just concentrate on one thing.

The problem however begins when you enter the professional field, I have already commented on the blog description but I will reiterate, I graduated in Law and exercised the profession for a year as an intern, before I graduate I had started the same course one year before, but stopped in the first half of the first year as I went to  a crisis like, "Oh my God is that what I want to do for the rest of my life?", for this reason I take off one year to reflect, and then I decided that yes, I wanted to do the course, but after three years I realized that I loved the classes and the course itself but I didn't want in any way to be a lawyer.

I finished college because there were only two years left and I really like to study law, but when the course end my family began to press me, "you will not make the OAB test?" (without this test you can't be a lawyer), and I always brushed it aside saying, "yes, I will, but only next year," the truth is that I didn't want to take that test.

Finally I started working in the accounting office of my father to help him and my sister, and it's not a bad job, but it's not something I wanted to do for the rest of my life, and then came a new problem, I asked myself what I really like to do? and the answer to that question was ... I don't know.

That's it, so began my new life crisis, I spent hours crying when I realized that I just didn't know what I wanted to do professionally, I knew I liked to write, to read, that I was a highly communicative person, liked geek and pop culture, liked to travel, loved researching all kinds of things, but didn't know if it were sought qualities in a job.

After this small outbreak I started looking for jobs, and once again I came across another obstacle, every time I found something really cool and that I would like to do, it required a degree in an area that I hadn't, and you can imagine how frustrating this is, knowing that you fits the description but does not have necessary.

Right now I'm in one of my phases, "Okay! The world hates me", exactly for the things described above, I feel frustrated to see people who find themselves in the world and find exactly what they like to do and is fortunate to actually work professionally in the area.

But that doesn't stop me to keep trying, I'm still looking for that cool job, but that doesn't mean I'm not giving myself 110% to my current job.

And if you've read this that far thinking that you would going to read how I managed to get out of this and find my dream job, I'm sorry but the battle for me just begun.

What I can say is, don't lose hope and keep giving your best, my grandmother always told me that when you try really hard you will always be rewarded.

I don't know for sure what the fate reserved for me, but I know it will be wonderful and that it's up to me makes that happens.